Monthly Archives: January 2019

You can complain cops

Here at the Robot Farm (where we farm for robots and not where robots farm), we occasionally get this email. It’s funny every time as the content degrades and the amount demanded shrinks over time. DONT BE FULLISH. OUR SQUAD … Continue reading

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You are too late, it already happened.

It’s dumb, but I am always surprised (pleasantly) when confronted by well wishers on my birthday. I am also always thankful. Who doesn’t like serendipitous greetings from people who didn’t have to take the time, but did anyway. I also … Continue reading

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Your kids will always be kids in your eyes

There’s a curious trend I see in the fast food restaurants in my area (McDonald’s Burger King etcetera. All of them seem to be ripping out the “scream chambres” (you know what I mean) and remodeling their places to make … Continue reading

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So close to perfect.

I would like to propose we change our national anthem to David Bowie’s “I’m afraid of Americans.” With one minor lyrical change. “I’m afraid of Americans ‘ cause THEY’RE afraid of the world.”

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One small caveat

When I am at work, and someone (even me) says that they don’t want to be there, I always say “you can leave whenever you want.” It isn’t to be mean (mostly). It is to change the parameters of the … Continue reading

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Just a reminder

It occurred to Pooh and Piglet that they hadn’t heard from Eeyore for several days, so they put on their hats and coats and trotted across the Hundred Acre Wood to Eeyore’s stick house. Inside the house was Eeyore. “Hello … Continue reading

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Theory vs application

Some people have said that I am not romantic. To this, I say, “Au contraire, mon frere.” When it comes to the ephemeral pre-relationship romance, wine and dine, flirt and dance, passion verging on obsession but never veering into “oppressive” … Continue reading

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Corperate humbuggery

I haven’t done this in a while, partially because I have been in a funk, but mostly because nothing has inspired me. We here at the Robot Farm ( where we farm for robots and not where robots farm) we … Continue reading

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Clever word play

“The law, in its majestic equality, forbids the rich as well as the poor to sleep under bridges, to beg in the streets, and to steal bread.” -Anatole France OH… I see what you did there.

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Thurber

“All human beings should try to learn before they die what they are running from, and to, and why.” -James Thurber

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