What is this “real” anyway?

Never Google “What makes you a REAL writer”. The overwhelming melange of bull-shittery will drown you. That being said, I feel that if you have worn off letters on your computer keyboard, BUT it does not hamper your productivity in the slightest… you might be a real writer.

No photo description available.


“Etaoin shrdlu” (eh-tay-oh-in shird-loo), is believed to be the twelve most common letters used in the English language.
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Go with the flow

How do you deal with your impostor syndrome, when you discover that you are the one everyone else turns to in order to make it possible for them to deal with their impostor syndrome?

I’m… uh… asking for a friend.

Today at the Robot Farm (where we farm for robots and not where robots farm) it was determined that I am not, in fact, the anus upon which the entire company sits.
Rather, I am the Malox… and possibly the Miralax.
Either way, without me the shit does not flow.
This place is going to be constipated for a week in April.

This may be the best random quote yet.

“The Internet is like alcohol in some sense. It accentuates what you would do anyway. If you want to be a loner, you can be more alone. If you want to connect, it makes it easier to connect.”
– Esther Dyson

By extension, just as those who are trolls, they would be trolls IRL anyway, just buffered by their lack of anonymity.
Oe Nipplenarcs, the one who report our “naughty photos” so they can feel like they are powerful and are making a difference from the safety of their anonymity cocoon.

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I AM THE ROBOT FARM!

(where we farm for robots and not where robots farm).

Its a crazy day here at The Robot Farm (where we farm for robots and not where robots farm). I am THE ENTIRE SERVICE DEPARTMENT, I am also the shipping and receiving department, the chief tech for research and development and the pretty girl in the short skirt who makes the coffee and answers the phones.

Only one word of that is a lie.
Maybe two.
So I am spending my break time sitting on tge loading dock, enjoying the weather, waithing on FedEx, UPS, USPS, DMX, Run- DMC, Fed-oops, And red neck Earl and his trusty rusty pickup truck… drinking a cup of the finest double strong free corporate coffee made by the prettiest girl in the shop… and typing like a madman with my thumbs.

Because I am a wierdeaux.

But I love you….
You so purdy and you smell good.

Also, at least I am not this guy?

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The t-shirt of the day 3-14-19

The t-shirt of the day is…

“NEIN!!!!!
DAS IST BRAUNES WASSER!!!!!”

– Coffee Nazi.

Before you ask…
Yes, of course it is printed on a brownshirt.

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When I am not writing about building, I am building.

We have only just begun, and it is already a momentous day here at The Robot Farm (where we farm for robots and not where robots farm).
Merely an hour in and we already have a strong candidate for phrase of the day.

Its not a fully fledged “fuck off”. It’s an more polite one like, “Fornicate Yonder, if you please”.

Today, amongst the usual rigamarole, I have been voluntold to craft a unique battery pack consisting 15 interconnected bb2590 batteries.
If you dont know what those are, might I suggest consulting Googlepedia.
Anywho, this is guaranteed to be paradigm shifting, either through versatility and functionality, or via pyrotechnics.
Only time will tell.
There will be five cells wired in parallel, each cell consisting of three bb2590 in series. Actually each bb2590 has two cells, and I am wiring 3 cells in series, so each cel is really 1 1/2 bb2590. Thus three bb2590 to make two cells, 10 cells in one pack, 15 batteries over all, all coming down into two realky big wires, tge red one, and the black one.

Easy peasy lemon squeezy.
What could possibly go wrong?

MEANWHILE…

The quote voices are talking at me today.

“Sometimes I worry about being a success in a mediocre world.”
-Lilly Tomlin

Well…

“Nothing changes your opinion of a friend so surely as success – yours or his.”
– Franklin P. Jones

Slightly sexist….but I get your point Frank.

“Good-bye. I am leaving because I am bored.”
-George Saunders

Aw come on George….don’t be that way.

“The man who lets himself be bored is even more contemptible than the bore.”
-Samuel Butler

Well that’s just mean Sammy, just mean.

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I swear, I have a neck in there.

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Wisdom of the ages

I heard a bit of wisdom in my otherworld journeys last night.

If you want to, you can dance.
But if you dont want to dance,
you should drink.

Note, I never claimed this wisdom was of any value.

I have also discovered that a new metric by which to measure my days has crept into my life.
Pill days.
Ideally, every day should be a zero pill day.
I only get zero pill days when I have zero commitments, and I am absent minded.
There are usually negative consequences for me the next day, and they are cumulative.
Most days for me, the optimum is one or two, the crazy pill and the BP I take just so I can eat more salt.

Today was a nine pill day.
It would have been a ten pill day, but I forgot the flintstones vitamin pill.

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I wasn’t finished yet.

I have had a pretty good run without voices, but last night I dreamed two parts of a trillogy (damn alarm… and work and stuff…)
The collapse and rebirth of a magical world… and now the voices keep singing at me.

Shiney, shiney, shiney boots of leather
Whiplash girl child in the dark
Comes in bells, your servant, don’t forsake him
Strike, dear mistress, and cure his heart.

What is up with that?
Go away voices.
I ain’t got time for you today.

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New South Whales

A quickie from the Robot Farm (where we farm for robots and not where robots farm)

I just spent 30 minutes, tracking down a shipment request made in January to get an address.
It us supposed to be for New South Wales in Australia.

I had to dig through emails to narrow down the date, then page through all the requests on that day one at a time.
I found it.

Aparently it was shipped to the
New South Whales instead.

What would that be?
Eubalaena Australus?
The Southern Right Whale?

Also, did you know that when you laugh out loud while simultaneously banging your head against your desk top… it makes your co-minions VERY uncomfortable?

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Warlocked 3 is online, but where?

It’s weird.
When I ego search for the third book NOTHING shows up.
I need to learn about SEO or something.

The first book is on Barns and Nobel though
https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/warlocked-rick-wasserman/1128972388?ean=9781720910947h

books a million too.
http://www.booksamillion.com/product/9781720910947

and indiebound…. clearly they don’t know I published through Amazon.
https://www.indiebound.org/book/9781720910947

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